Grief with Hope

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matt 5:4

This morning, I grieve. The family at Zion Lutheran lost two very special ladies on Friday. They were both very gentle and kind; but, also very strong. Both Eunice and Carol were strong in Lord, in their faith.

It is difficult to lose someone you love. It is natural to grieve. Yet our grief is not without hope. St. Paul wrote to the Thessalonians: "And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died." 1 Thess 4:13-14

I am grateful for the opportunity to have known both of these women. It brings me peace to know that even as Christ rose from the dead and lives, so shall all who believe in him.

God's Peace - Pr. J

I Don't Know; But, God Does

We had been planning a special service for All Saint's Day for some time. Then schedules got turned around and we couldn't do it, so I focused on something totally different than had been previously planned. At worship, yesterday, it turned out the schedules weren't as turned around as we had thought. We could have gone with our original plan; but, we didn't. I believe it went the way God intended it to go. He knows what's coming up long before we do.

Within the past week, we have had three deaths of family members from our congregation. I wrote my Sunday sermon early last Monday, focusing on the promise of eternal life in the kingdom of God with all the saints. I did not realize until I actually started preaching that what I planned was exactly what was needed as two of the deaths occurred after I wrote it. I did not realize on Monday how many would need a reminder of comfort and hope in the eternal kingdom for all who believe until I was actually preaching it and seeing the response in their faces. But, God did. He knew long before Monday.

Years ago, while I was being trained to visit shut-ins, my mentor and I were sitting in the parking lot of a bar in a very small town discussing our plan for the day. A woman, who had been using the pay phone outside, came over, introduced herself, and invited us over to visit her mother and her. Until that day, neither of us knew of her. After our scheduled visits we went over to visit them. Her mother and my mentor were busy discussing the history of the area when all of a sudden he's talking about the death of a young person in his family. I was aghast. It seemed to come out of no where. It just seemed so off the wall and we were there to bring encouragement and comfort; not to be comforted ourselves. The woman who invited us in, began to cry. She related that she was visiting her mother because her husband had just died and she was having a very difficult time with the grieving process. This pastor's story opened the way for her to be able to begin talking about it and to be reminded that all who believe; yet, even though they die, shall live with all the saints in the kingdom of God. What seemed like a very odd turn in the conversation, turned out to be exactly what was needed to bring about a bit of peace and hope for the woman. I had no clue where this pastor was going. He didn't, either. But, God knew exactly where He was leading him.

Sometimes, we just have to follow the Spirit's guidance. We don't always know for what purpose we are being called or sent. We don't always know why we feel compelled to say things that would not normally fit the circumstances. But, God does. Listen to him. Follow where He will lead you. Do not be afraid to proclaim the good news of the Kingdom of God!

God's Peace - Pr. J
 

Kat

Kat

Kat was my shadow for about seventeen years. I did not dare leave her for too long. If I left her overnight any where or with any one, she would cry tears of grief. It's been a few years since she died; but, I find myself still grieving from time to time over the loss of this little companion.

We all suffer losses of one kind or another throughout our lives. Kat was with me through many of my losses. I have been told that when stress or grief begins to affect our health we should pet our dogs. It will have a calming effect. It does. Kat was with me through a lot of hard times.

Kat is no longer here. But, someone else is and always has been. Jesus is with me and he is with you. When grief threatens to overwhelm us there is one to whom we can turn who will not only comfort us; but, also, offer us real hope. He promises that he will be with us always. We are never alone. Jesus is with us today and tomorrow and for all eternity.

God's Peace - Pr. J

God's Peace

"Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in all ways. The Lord be with all of you." 2 Thess 3:16

One of the most peaceful places I have ever visited was Puerto Rico. The warm winds were blowing as they do all year. We made the journey a couple of years ago to visit a friend who was in hospice. We did not make it in time to visit him as he died before we got on the plane. We were able to visit with his wife and sons.

In spite of the grief, there was serenity surrounding the visit. The wife, a friend of mine, is a very faithful woman. No matter what trials or tribulations she has faced over the decades, she has faced them with courage and with the peace of heart that only God can give.

As we face the winds and waves of various storms, may God grant us peace at all times and in all ways.

God's Peace - Pr. J

Clergy Duties

Table of Duties
Certain passages of scripture for various holy orders and positions,
admonishing them about their duties and responsibilities

For Bishops, Pastors, and Preachers.

A bishop must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach; not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; one that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; not a novice; holding fast the faithful Word as he hath been taught, that he may be able by sound doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers. 1 Tim. 3:2ff ; Titus 1:6.

What the Hearers Owe to Their Pastors.

Even so hath the Lord ordained that they which preach the Gospel should live of the Gospel. 1 Cor. 9:14. Let him that is taught in the Word communicate unto him that teacheth in all good things. Gal. 6:6. Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honor, especially they who labor in the Word and doctrine. For the Scripture saith, Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn; and the laborer is worthy of his reward. 1 Tim. 5:17-18. Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves; for they watch for your souls as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy and not with grief; for that is unprofitable for you. Heb. 13:17.]

http://bookofconcord.org/smallcatechism.php

 

There are definitely days filled with grief when it should be joy. It is a very sad thing to proclaim the good news and that good news is met with all kinds of obstacles. There are days when I wonder if it is all striving after the wind (Eccl 1:14) as attempts are made to "muzzle the ox." 

 

Today, I read an article about another pastor who is an atheist. I wondered how she got to be a pastor in the first place. I surmise that it was because someone or a lot of someones had "itching ears." They appreciated the humanistic prattle because it appeased their sense of right and wrong. Even as Martin Luther appeals to a sense of good character; he also reminds us that we must hold fast the faithful Word in order to exhort and convince the gainsayers.

 

I heard news yesterday that a friend has received a call to serve out of the area. She will be moving soon. I will miss her. For my ordination she gave me a framed reminder of my call that I keep in my home office. It says "Comfort The Disturbed. Disturb The Comfortable." Doing either can sometimes bring grief rather than joy. Sharing the Word of God, which is a two-edged sword always seems to make someone unhappy and in return the one who shares the Word will receive grief. If one comforts the disturbed that others deem should have no comfort then you're in trouble. If one disturbs those who are too comfortable the pastor is also likely to receive grief. But, it is the job description! 

 

We are not called to make friends of the world. We are called to hold fast to the faithful Word and to proclaim it (regardless of who it offends) so that other might hear and believe.

 

God's Peace - Pr. J 

1 Peter 1:1-12 Grace and Peace Be Yours In Abundance

1 Peter 1:1-12
I was recently asked to think about the most awesome thing that has ever happened to me. I will tell you. It happened about 30 years ago. It was the day that I met the Holy Spirit. On that day I got to know the Spirit as a living reality. Previously, I had known about the Holy Spirit; but, did not know the Spirit. That day, kneeling beside my bed praying, I came to know the Spirit. No man laid his hands on me. God did. By God's grace I came to know and experience life in and with the Spirit of Christ. Words cannot even begin to describe the joy and peace that I experienced that day and since. Nothing in this world can compare to being in relationship with God the Father; God the Son; and God the Holy Spirit. If you are looking for joy and peace in this world give up that search. It is not here. These things come living in relationship with the living God, not by possessions in this world. As children of Almighty God, we have an inheritance much more precious than any silver or gold.

God had been preparing me for things to come; for immediately following this introduction, I was tested tremendously. But, I persevered (not just persevered; but grew in Christ) because God was with me. Listen to the words of St. Peter: "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials." (vs 3-6)

In Christ, you have been born again. There will be trials; but, in the midst of these trials God is with all His children. Persevere in faith and you will know joy and peace even in the times of trials.

May grace and peace be yours in abundance, through Jesus Christ, our Lord, by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Pr. J.

1 Corinthians 15:12-58 Death, Grief, Comfort; The Word of God

1 Corinthians 15:12-58 NIV
In our reading today we have a couple of readings that are often used for funerals. At a church conference a few years ago, I remember hearing a pastor, who was also an author, tell us that we need to remember that the "dead are dead." She was confident that scripture would not bring anyone comfort. I beg to differ with her and am amazed that she professed to be a Christian and a pastor at that. I am not sure what she was suggesting we should do or say then to comfort others in their grief. I see no purpose for funerals or memorials if there is no chance for hope to those who are dying inside while yet in this world.

The Word of God is our only real comfort in times like these. Scripture would remind us that even though we die we shall live. It is a great mystery. We cannot totally understand it; but, those who believe that Jesus died and was risen from the grave are confident that they and all who believe will follow in his footsteps though the gate of death into eternal life. Death does not have the victory over us. Jesus has victory over death for all who would follow him.

He is risen and ascended! So shall we!

God's Peace - Pr. J

John 20:11-18 Jesus Speaks To You

John 20:11-18 NIV
I ran into one of our local law enforcement officials the other day. I have known him for about 16 years. For some reason, I thought he was someone else I have known, just as long, in the law enforcement community. That same day, I received a call from a family member who I haven't heard from in awhile. At first, I thought she was one of my parishioners with a similar name. It took a few seconds to figure out who she really was.

It has been a very busy wseek. No, it has been a very busy and hectic summer. I was tired and had my mind other things; things that I was actually suppose to be doing at the time. When this happens, I sometimes forget names of people and I am just a bit slower in "connecting all the dots." It doesn't mean I can't connect them; just that I am a bit slower at times. Times of grief; whether it is my grief or someone else' grief can be particularly strong impetus toward my having a poor memory.

Mary was grieving when she met Jesus in the garden. She did not know what had happened to her beloved Jesus. His body was not in the tomb. Where could he be? Who could have taken his body? She was grieving and anxious when she turned and talked to the man in the garden. She did not recognize her beloved Jesus. She did not know him until he spoke to her, calling her by name.

Sometimes, grief or anxiety will cause us all kinds of problems with daily living. We may be so focused on what we are going through; we fail to realize the reality of what others are going through. We may fail to see Jesus living in and through others. We may fail to see the hand of God using our grief and/or anxiety for the good of us or others. Be assured that God can and will use all things for the good of all people. According to Paul's letter to the Romans:8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Jesus call you. He calls you by name. Answer him.

God's Peace - Pr. J

John 16:16-33 Grief; Then Joy

John 16:16-33 NIV
Jesus warns his disciples that shortly they will no longer see him. Then, after a while, they will see him again. They will grieve and then they will rejoice? They are confused. They haven't a clue what he is talking about. He appears to be talking in riddles, again.

Lest we forget what we've read in preceding chapters let's review. Jesus tells his disciples these things in the Upper Room on the eve of his crucifixion. He is about to be betrayed. He is about to be put to death. Emotions will run high in the coming days. They will run and hide in fear as they grieve his death. Yet, in just a few more days they will be rejoicing when they find him risen from the dead.

Jesus likened what they would be going through to a woman giving birth. First, pain; then, when the child is born there will be rejoicing. It is this way with many of the trials we go through. It may feel as the world is coming to an end for us. We may even think that we do not want to endure another day on earth. But, as we journey through the dark shadows that we must endure, we find at the other side a beautiful rainbow and the Son shining. We rejoice.

Do not be afraid for God is with you. Take heart. Even though you will encounter trouble in this world; God has a good plan for you. Rejoice, for He has overcome the world and in Him you will know peace.
God's Peace - Pr. J

Ezekiel 24 - We All Grieve In Our Own Way

Everyone grieves in their own way. In today's lesson Ezekiel's wife dies. He is commanded by God not to show any outward expression of grief. He can groan within. But, he is to go about the day as if it was just another day. This is to be done as a sign to Israel that the sanctuary will be desecrated and when their own sons and daughters will die by the sword they will not be afforded the opportunity to grieve them openly. Instead they will waste away as they are left to grieve within themselves.

Everyone grieves in there own way. Funerals and Memorial Services are more so for the living than for the dead. We need a way to begin to grieve and we do this by sharing the stories of our loved one. We do this by sharing stories of their faith and faithfulness. We do this openly. Even if one does not openly participate in the sharing of their stories or visible signs of their grief; they are listening. They are hearing. They are grieving.

It is not always so; but, often, those who are not allowed free expression of their grief in whatever manner they personally grieve will internalize it and begin to waste away. The wasting away may not be physical. Rather, it might be spiritual or emotional. So often after the funeral, friends disappear. They do not want to hear and share in the grief of spouses or children or parents. They want to get on with life and they want the person who is grieving to get on with life. Living life is a good thing. But, remember, that we all grieve in our own way and grief can very well be a life-long experience. If you love them, allow them the stories, the memories. For in remembering, we are re-membered (re-connected) to the loved ones we have lost.

Can you imagine how much Ezekiel's wife endured just being married to Ezekiel? You don't get to hear much about her, only her death. And... even her death is not allowed to be publicly grieved.

We all grieve in our own way. May God help us to be a comfort to others in their times of loss.

God's Peace - Pr. J

Lamentations 1 - Much Grief

The temple has been destroyed. The people dispersed. There is much grief, thus the name Lamentations for this book of poetry.

No where in this poem is Babylon or Nebuchadnezzar mentioned by name. God is given credit for the destruction and the exile.

“Is it nothing to you, all you who pass by?
    Look around and see.
Is any suffering like my suffering
    that was inflicted on me,
that the Lord brought on me    in the day of his fierce anger?" (Lam 1:12 NIV)

Is there anything that God does not see? Is there anything that He cannot do? His chosen ones have turned their backs on Him; seeking their own glory rather than His; now weeping for what once was and for what could have been.

May God help us to always seek His face so that we might know peace in His land.

God's Peace - Pr. J.

Isaiah 15 - "Every head is shaved and every beard cut off."

"Every head is shaved and every beard cut off." (Isa 15:2b NIV)

Today's reading comes at a very fortuitous time. Today, my godson, who will graduate from High School next week, will cut his hair for the first time. His habit has been to wear it in a braid down the middle of his back. I like that braid. But, it is his hair and he can do with it what he chooses.

I, myself have worn my hair long most of my life, except for that pixie cut my mother gave me when I was a teen and that brief period in the early 80's when I got tired of my husband complaining about me not wearing my hair like other women my age - short. He wanted me to look my age! LOL! I had it cut to the length of less than an inch. He hasn't requested I cut my hair since then. The last time I actually had my hair cut was when Maurice, a teen at a correctional facility, was being trained as a barber. I was his first client. That was in the spring of 1998. He cut off about 6 inches. There had been rumors among the boys at the facility that I was a Nazarite because of my long hair and the fact that I do not drink - plus I have a few food issues with things like pork. It makes me ill... so they never saw me eat it. The hair cut was a way to show Maurice that I trusted him enough to give him that much power over me. He was, after all, a young felon, standing behind me with scissors, in a facility where he was not allowed to handle even sharp steak knives. I have trimmed a few split ends since that day. But, nothing more.

Long hair has, in many cultures, been a sign of power and strength. Some cultures cut off the hair of conquered enemies to show their control over them - to shame them even further. It was a sign of great loss - a sign of someone without power. The shaving of the hair or the beard was also used as a sign of the grief experienced from losses incurred during war or even natural death.

In today's reading they are mourning the losses incurred by Moab and so every head is shaved and every beard cut off.

I guess, in a sense, it is fitting that my godson is cutting his hair today. He is making a great transition, from High School into the work force (hopefully) and college which he will enter this fall. He will be taking on even greater responsibilities and he will, as all of the young people graduating, lose contact with many friends. Many things change with graduation. Everyone celebrates! But, even as we celebrate, it is also fitting that we grieve the loss of a childhood as they step out into the world as young men and women with all the responsibilities of an adult.

God's Peace - Pr. J

Ecclesiates 1 - Life Is Meaninless Without Love

Although there are those who would refute attributing Ecclesiastes to the writing of Solomon, the contents indicate that he was. For my part, I will proceed with the understanding that Solomon indeed wrote Ecclesiastes. After all, who would be the wise king, son of David, king in Jerusalem if it were not Solomon?  

"The words of the Teacher, son of David, king in Jerusalem." (Eccl 1:1 NIV)

"I, the Teacher, was king over Israel in Jerusalem. I applied my mind to study and to explore by wisdom all that is done under the heavens." (Eccl 12, 13)

 

Solomon's search for knowledge and wisdom, brought him not an enlightenment that would satisfy, but depression. Solomon finds instead that everything under the sun, is meaningless. "For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief." (Eccl 1:18)

 

One of my mother's favorite sayings for when one of us kids did something stupid was: "No brains, no pains." Then she'd leave it at that. I'm not sure if that's the most appropriate thing to tell a child. But, we got the point. With wisdom and knowledge comes many opportunities; but, with opportunities comes many challenges and often some trying times. My mother's view was that accepting the opportunities and challenges that come with gaining wisdom and knowledge was worth the bit of hardship one might have to endure.

 

Solomon, on the other hand, who was wiser than any other man, has found that his seeking knowledge was meaningless in the end. In the end, every living thing under the sun dies. As we read through Ecclesiastes, I hope that we will come to the understanding that not everything is futile. But, that it is possible to strive for greater knowledge and wisdom, even while we enjoy the fruits of this life that God has given us. We are to live life, not just bury ourselves in seeking after knowledge. Books are good, but life is still to be enjoyed.

 

Another thing to remember about Solomon is that as he decided to marry foreign wives, he also decided to worship their gods, as well. This is not good. Worshipping false gods is utterly meaningless and a source of the emptiness that many feel. Solomon, I fear, lived a life as a seeker. He was seeking meaning for his life. It was a life devoid of real relationships founded on a relationship with the one true God, who gifted him with much wisdom. His life probably lacked love. After all, how lonely is the man who would need to have 700 wives and 300 concubines? I believe he was one who may have had wisdom, but not real relationships. Not with God and consequently not with the people around him. So we have a man, who has found that his pursuit of wisdom and knowledge was meaningless. He never really lived life.

 

May God grant you a greater relationship with Him and with those around you that you may live life more fully.

 

God's Peace - Pr. J

Psalm 88 - Low Pits and Dark Depths

You've probably been there. Maybe, you're not now. But, most of us have been in that low pit, the darkest depths at one time or another. The last thing you feel at night is loneliness and grief and the first thing you wake up knowing is the same loneliness and grief.

We pray, "How long, LORD, before you save us from this miserable state that we have entered into?" We know that only the LORD can save us. Yet, in our deep despair, the recognition that God has not turned His back on us, humanity has turned its back on God often eludes us.

Most of us know what it is like to be in the darkness and we can empathize with those who are there now and so... we keep them in our prayers.

May the LORD grant faith to all who find themselves in this dark and lonely pit. May God grant you eyes to see His light shining in the darkness of the world.

God's Peace - Pr. J

Psalm 61 - Listen To My Prayer

"Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer." (Psalm 61:1 NIV)

Who else will listen?  Who else will answer?  None can hear or answer like the LORD, our God.

We are in the midst of Advent preparing for the Christmas season.  I know of no other season of the year when the level of grief is so high.  There is always grief, but it is accentuated during this season, as we remember loved ones who are no longer with us; loved ones who cannot prepare or celebrate the season with us.  So, ultimately many do not celebrate, but grieve and they grieve alone, with none to hear, but God.

The only comfort is God; by trusting in His promises we can find comfort and peace. We long to be closer to Him, to dwell in His Kingdom and to take refuge in the shelter of His wings so that we might find real comfort, real peace. (vs 4)

The Lord, our God, hears our prayers and answers.  May He bless you with the knowledge of His promises, through Jesus Christ, for you and for all who believe.  May He grant you comfort and peace in His presence.

God's Peace - Pr. J

Psalm 43 - Grief

"Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?" (vs 2 NIV)

Have you ever felt totally depressed and can't really figure out why?  Grief comes in lots of forms and for many reasons.  The most common reason for grief is the death of someone we love.  But, there are lots of other reasons.  One, which we often fail to recognize, is the loss of a relationship.  Sometimes, that loss is through a divorce.  Thanks to that wonderful thing called denial, we don't often recognize the depression that we sink into as grief.  After all, are we not better off?  The marriage, the relationship, was broken.  It was totally dysfunctional.  Shouldn't we be relieved? 

Children are left grieving the loss of family when parents separate.  Divorces are not the only broken relationships that leave us grieving.  It could be that we've had a major disagreement with a close friend - a disagreement that leaves us not speaking to one another. And... there is a whole list of other things, besides family and friends, that, when gone, will leave us in grief.  The loss of a job, our home, safety, as well as any material object can leave us grieving and in many cases we won't even realize that we grieving for them  But, the loss will leave us feeling depressed, lost in the darkness, and alone.

We are coming into the season of Advent as we prepare for Christmas.  For those who are already experiencing grief, this season does not help.  While the world expects everyone to be happy, happy, happy; those grieving either retreat into a shell or put on a happy face for their family and friends, while they feel like they are dying inside.   

There are many reasons that one might be grieving. It is not something we should be ignoring. The first step is to recognize that, in fact, you are very sad over your loss or maybe it is someone whom you love that you need to recognize is grieving and allow them to share, to talk about their grief with you.  I have found it all too common, that after the funeral or divorce, nobody wants to hear, nobody will listen.  There is nobody to share your burden with.  Unfortunately, for some, in this world, that is a reality.  There is no place to turn except to Jesus.  He can be trusted with you burden.  He already has.  We may not always understand why or what we are grieving.  But, we can always trust in the LORD to help us through, one day at a time.

"Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." (vs 5)

God's Peace - Pr. J